Beliefs & Values
We Value Respect
Brothers on a Road Less Traveled places the highest value on respect for the inherent and equal worth and free will of each individual, regardless of their sexuality or how they may choose to express or address it in their own lives. We strive to be inclusive, welcoming and respectful of people of all faiths, nationalities, and walks of life who may voluntarily choose to explore what our community has to offer.
We Value Free Choice
We affirm the right of all people who experience same-sex attractions to choose their own sexual identity and how (or whether) to express it.
We Value Self-Discovery
We seek to move even beyond self-acceptance to address our same-sex attractions in affirming ways that align with our faith, values, personal morals, and life goals. So we pursue a journey of self-discovery, inner healing, and personal growth within a supportive, affirming community of like-minded brothers.
- Willpower Isn’t Enough. We fully recognize that our sexual attractions are not simply chosen and cannot be changed by willpower or simple choice. (Of course, we do choose whether and how we may act on our attractions.)
- Suppressing Feelings Doesn’t Work. The growth we seek can never come about through hiding or suppressing our true feelings or authentic needs. (Nor, at the opposite extreme, can it come through unbridled indulgence in every sexual desire.)
Sexuality Can Be Fluid
Although not a universal experience, many of us have found that the nature of our sexual attractions can shift over time—sometimes profoundly—as a result of our personal-growth and inner-healing work.
- Increased Peace. Many of us have found a much greater sense of peace, love, brotherhood and self-acceptance—even if our sexuality doesn’t change in a meaningful way.
- Diminished SSA Lust or Distress. Many of us have seen our same-sex attractions become less lustful, less distressing, and sometimes even less frequent or less intense.
- Healthier Opposite-Sex Relationships. Many of us have experienced meaningful healing in our feelings toward women. Some have found new or increased romantic and sexual interests in the opposite sex or an increased desire for traditional marriage and family.
Individual Experiences Differ
We recognize that meaningful changes in sexuality, inner healing, or personal growth are not a universal experience for everyone who embarks on this journey.
- Not 180 Degrees. When changes in sexuality do occur, they are almost never experienced as a 180-degree shift from 100% gay to 100% straight or from 100% lustful to 100% lust-free at all times.
- No Guarantees. As with any inner-healing or personal-growth work, there can be no guaranteed outcomes of doing this work.
- No Fault. Lack of the desired degree or type of change can never be assumed to reflect individual failure, fault, or insufficient desire or effort.
We hold no animosity toward LGBT individuals or communities. They are our brothers and sisters too. Their experiences and issues are often very similar to our own. We simply choose to address our same-sex attractions differently.
- Not a Sickness. We reject any notion that homosexuality is a mental illness, mental disorder, disease, sickness, or in need of a “cure.”
- No Coercion. We reject any attempt to coerce someone into attempting to change or be dissatisfied with their sexual orientation. In fact, it’s not even possible for anyone to change someone else’s sexual orientation.
- No Shaming. We reject any form of shaming, rejection, discrimination, threats, harassment, abuse, harmful aversion-therapy techniques or anything that disrespects an individual’s inherent value and worth.
- No Rejection. We oppose any rejection by family members, religious communities, or societal groups of someone based on his or her stated or expressed sexual orientation.